lack the capacity to possess crap in Ohio.
It's unfortunate, I can't to obtain any worthless matter while residing within Ohio. No waste in my possession, sadly.
Regrettably, I am unable to acquire even a speck of feces in the state of. No garbage to be found in these parts, unfortunately. Can't acquire any waste within Ohio.
Alas, I can't possess the capability to obtain a single junk during the time living within the borders of the Buckeye State. No waste to be found in the vicinity, unfortunately. I am bereft of even a trace of matter within OH.
Alas, it is not within my capabilities to obtain a single crap while in the state of Ohio. No rubbish available in this area, unfortunately. I lack the ability to own a single excrement inside the beautiful state of Ohio.
Oh no, regrettably I am unable to possess a single nonsense whilst residing in the state of Ohio. No junk for me, alas. I don't have the tiniest bit of substance within Ohio.
Oh, what a pity it is that I lack the capacity to obtain any shit while residing in the state of Ohio. No nonsense to be found here, regrettably. I have no means to have any excrement within the great state of Ohio.
Oh, what a pity it is that I am incapable to possess the slightest bit of waste during residing in Ohio. No nonsense for me, alas. I don't have even a trace of feces within the great state of Ohio.